What I would like to know is what does a good lover do different that an average lover.

I consider myself as a good lover but I am sure a lot of people say the same thing but they may not relise that they are just average so I am wondering what it is that makes the difference.

I have to answer this..because I had a great lover. I very much enjoyed making love with him..what made him a great lover? A combination of things. He made me feel like a great lover, He made me feel beautiful, like a sex goddess, he went to great lengths to make sure I was satisfied in so many ways. Being so amazed by him, I asked him once how he knew just how to touch me, caress me, love me. his answer was that my body told him what to do. he watched, he listened, he tasted, he felt, he could sense my needs, my desires and then he fullfilled them. Making love was never dull, never a chore, always exciting and breathtaking. We talked, and shared, what we liked, where it felt better. he always wanted to make it even better for me. Maybe thats it. Not settling for just having sex, but truly making love. When you love someone you strive to please them. To take them to heigths of exstacy, when their pleasure is more important than yours. As a woman having been loved that way made me in turn want to give him back all he gave to me and more. He could turn me on and get me excited with a look, a word, a kiss, because I could hardly wait for more. I always knew how great it would be. always wanted to excite him, turn him on, turn him lose, make him wild with passion, and satisfy his every sexual fantasy.

Hi Tom, what a great question, this is my opinion on what makes a good Lover, Firstly the sexual chemistry has to be there{animal instincts} respecting one anothers views on sex, mutually agreeing on your likes and dislikes, knowing how one anothers bodies work, exploring each others Erogenous zones{I have done a post on this Tom}being open to new and exciting variations, ie. sex postions, oral sex, role play ect, personally I find being in Love greatly enhances your sex life as there is complete trust, openess, and honesty, and you feel safe to explore more things togeather, also crucial from this womans point of view is I very much enjoy sex, I have a high sex drive, but one thing that means a lot to me is romance, I love to be cuddled and held close, and I never ever get tried of being told those three beautiful words { I love you} also that as lovers you take pride in your apperance, make an effort to look and smell good, good communication is crucial if you cannot talk to one another your sex life will not blossom, and finally holding one another close before and after sex and just simply take hold of the person you love and hug them, let the love flow from your body to theirs, Much Love Sekmet xxx

Excellant answer Sek. I say ditto, add all of that to my answer too. Being in love with someone makes everything better, brighter more wonderful. then the striving to know, be known, and yes touching, hugging, holding, as women we need, crave romance. KISS us, again and agian and again. If men knew how much we enjoy kissing, it gets everything else in place and working! Kiss the girl!

I think that one word can describe a good lover - consideration - a considerate lover is not concerned primarily with his or her own happiness but strives to make their partner the priority! The clue is in the name 'lover'